“HOW on earth do you do it?!”
I could’t even try to estimate how many times I’ve heard that in the last year. I almost expect to hear it when I tell people that Bobby is in the Army, and I know I’ll get that reaction if I throw in the fact that we spent almost 6 months of 2015 over 1,000 miles apart. But it always makes me think, what is “it“? Could “it” be loving someone so much that the time spent apart is worth it in the end? Or is “it” just being supportive of my husband’s job? Maybe “it” is watching him lace up his boots in preparation to fight for the freedom of a country made up of too many people who take him and his battle buddies for granted. Whatever “it” is, I don’t think about it. I don’t need to. I married Bobby because of who he is as a person, regardless of his job. He could be a nuclear energy technician in Springfield (heh, get it?) and I’d still love him!
It seems like most people expect me to bitch and moan about being an Army wife, but I absolutely refuse to waste away my life with negative thoughts when there are millions of gleaming lights of positivity. The older I get, the more thankful I am for my parents teaching me “mind over matter“. I truly believe that you can trick your brain. Why? Because I got into the habit of doing exactly that years ago, and I still do it every day. After wasting away and wandering around hopelessly in no direction for way too long, I decided that my own happiness was my own choice and that if I wanted to be happy, only I could do something about it.
I started off small, listing 5 positive things every morning and 5 good things that happened each day before bed. When I found myself on the verge of a breakdown, sometimes too late, I’d analyze how I got there and then solve the issue and move on. Almost a month after deciding to go out and find my own happiness, I was feeling better and brighter. It took me a while to figure out that some things and people in this world just can’t be changed, and that it’s okay. Cutting out negativity is just as important as welcoming in the positive. I had an “a-ha!” moment when I realized that I’m a minuscule part of this world and that 99% of the things happening around me are completely out of my control. I wasted way too much valuable time just waiting for happiness to magically come to me, and then being disappointed over and over. Never again.
Nowadays it’s easy for me to find light in the darkness, mostly because I know it’s a choice and I’ve gotten into the habit of choosing to be happy. We may be moving across the U.S. twice within two weeks, during the holiday season, with the added stress of selling a car and more paperwork than you could imagine, but you won’t find me pouting. I’ve got the love of my life by my side and so much to look forward to; the light at the end of this tunnel is getting brighter every day.
I always remember this: “If you don’t like where you are, move. You are not a tree.”
P.S. Sorry I’ve neglected my blog for so long!! It’s been a whirlwind. I hope to have many, many more posts coming your way once we finally reach NY a day or two after Christmas. It looks like we’re going to get super lucky and will be seeing Bobby’s family in Chicago for Christmas on our way up to NY! Talk about a Christmas miracle.